Author: gregc

By Gregory Copploe

I am reminded every 4th of July about the word freedom and what it means, not only to this country, but how this word situates itself within my soul and what it means to me on a deeper level.

We have the freedom to tear down the walls of hatred and anger, and we have the freedom to lift others and create change that we all see is needed if we are to progress and more importantly, to survive as a species on this planet. We do inevitably need to work together, or we will be extinct. There is no ambiguity and no question within this statement. It is simply truth.

Too often, I see freedom as evil incarnate as it meanders around Earth, reeking havoc on others, creating a sense of continued strangulation, rather than a release and a continued flow of light and synchronicity.

Freedom does allow us a choice, a choice to be entwined within our self agenda, or to expand this gift in another way, where we see a continued connectivity and synergy with our fellow man. We have the freedom to take two parking spaces, to scam someone out of money, to beat down a fragile and vulnerable spirit, just because we can. We have the choice to kill, to steal, or to make right the wrongs we do and make amends as we trail a path and create a journey full of choices, full of freedom, or full of constriction and hate.

On the 4th of July, I reflect on the word “freedom” a word that many will never understand or experience in their lifetime. It is a privilege to have a life full of choices and pathways that are illuminated through thought and action as we shape our story.

I won’t forget how my Dad almost lost his life in the Vietnam War, and how he truly believed he was fighting for our freedom as this war led to his early death almost 30 years ago. Freedom has many connotations, varied meanings, and a distorted view for many of what it means to be free.

I still see cultures in this world fighting for that freedom, to be treated equal among their brothers and sisters as they are still beaten down, and not given the same opportunities as their fellow man. Freedom can be an insipid beast, but also a friend that unites and cleanses us with kindness and love.

Freedom is a privilege. Freedom is a choice. What will you do with your freedom? How will you fulfill your soul journey as you navigate the labyrinth, awaiting the day when you return home?

What role will you play, and how will freedom propel you to do your greatest work? Will you use it for good, as a vessel of light for your highest good? It’s a double edged sword, much like free will, and your choices matter. You make a difference in what you choose, and how you choose to do it.

Today I reflect on freedom. It is vast, and all encompassing, and it encircles me and reminds me to take the road that bleeds with truth, for only this road will lead to healing. Only this road will lead to love. Only this road will lead to our survival.

THE REAL REASON I WRITE. . .

. . .is that I realized I could do it all, literally, while  lying down.

I’ve aspired to write from the time I was a kid making stapled-together notebook paper “books” about girls and horses and dogs. It took a few decades for me actually to give myself the permission to undertake anything so creatively, financially and personally risky as trying to become a published author.

I wanted to start with a memoir. A particular concept for that came to me one night in 2015 as I stood under the shower; water is my most enduring muse. I started typing in fits and starts shortly after that. Because my outdated laptop was dying a slow death, there was little progress. Which was convenient because I found lots of other excuses to avoid showing up to write.

In the middle of 2016 my husband Paul got sick. Really sick. My iPhone was my one constant companion during days and nights waiting with him in doctor’s offices, visiting him in hospital rooms and keeping him company in chemo infusion centers. In between those times, at home, I had Paul’s old iPad that I inherited when he upgraded his.

As the disease progression and increasing doses of pain meds took Paul further and further from me, I took refuge in writing. I had the Pages app on both my phone and tablet. The “hunt and peck” method of typing was a little laborious at first, but it took me into a zone where I could forget, sort of anyway, that my world was disintegrating.

I sat in a chair and wrote while he was being treated. Then, when the treatments failed and I was told that it was basically time to take him home to die, I lay in bed writing next to him while he was awake or in the other bedroom while he slept. It was a comforting position, lying in bed. I felt physically supported and emotionally safe.

Paul passed away in July of 2017. In the aftermath of that loss I found myself unable to write with the speed and the fury and the focus that I pulled from myself during the long days and nights of his decline. Yet I did eventually manage to turn it all into a book, which is in final editing stage as of this writing.

Then came Covid. Initially, the whole stay-at-home thing was a relief because I’m an introvert at heart who nevertheless had spent the first years of widowhood in extroversion and activity. I felt obligated to live a life of extreme service and adventure in order to assuage my survivor’s guilt by living the life that Paul would have wanted me to live—and also to avoid marinating in the persistent, upsetting flashbacks of his illness and death. By the time they closed everything down in March of 2020, I was running on fumes.

In late 2020, deprived of the distraction offered by people, places and things, I started a long tumble down a rabbit hole of anxiety that was not helped by the endless news coverage of Covid, the election and the aftermath of the election. For over two years, I struggled with physical and emotional symptoms that were scary and exhausting.

A little over a year ago, a longtime friend emailed me a draft of a book he had written, I Am Pink, a tale of love, loss and redemption set on the island of Kauai. Serendipitously, I happened to be on that island when I received the email. Which isn’t at all surprising. I’ve been to Kauai many times; each visit somehow gives me a key that unlocks the next door I’m to walk through.

Greg wasn’t happy with the editing guidance he was getting so I offered to help him ready the book for release. I was still struggling at the time, so I thought the project might serve as a temporary refuge from the all the other, unwelcome visitors in my head.

Throughout the summer and fall of 2022, I edited. I started out making strictly grammatical and spelling changes, maybe swapping out a word here and there when I thought another would work better. And then I got a bit more adventurous, adding dialogue, a little tension where I felt it was needed, or a metaphor for a feeling that couldn’t otherwise be adequately described.

I did all of this on my phone’s Google Docs app while lying on my bed because my iPad’s battery was starting to drain too quickly. I eventually had it repaired but found I preferred my phone because I didn’t have to hook into anyone else’s internet service. I could lie down anywhere.

When I started adding chapters, Greg graciously made me a co-author. I continued to work in a prone position, no longer because I had to but because I wanted to.

I Am Pink, released on June 7, 2023, is about taking the road less traveled. About the peril, the joy, the messiness, the adventure, the romance and everything else that comes with choosing freedom and vibrancy instead of clinging to unworkable formulas. So often, what passes for living really isn’t.

I confess my preferred writing position not because I want to portray myself as some sort of terminally unique eccentric. I say it because the limiting formulas of what’s acceptable or usual or normal span all of life’s pursuits, whether we’re talking about how we learn, who or how we love, how and whether we parent, or how we create. If someone told me that I had to write while sitting at a desk in front of a desktop or even a laptop, I wouldn’t have written anything and I wouldn’t be writing now. I’m more me when my wordplay happens while reclined.

I think we all want to be who we truly are, especially as we’re doing what we love the most. I don’t think there’s a “right” way to do anything involving matters of the heart or self-expression. It is just so freeing to drop the formulas and reimagine new pathways to meaning.

By Gregory Copploe

What does it mean to show up for another person and walk along side them on their journey with true empathy in mind? How do we get there, and what kind of a mindset does it take to walk a path along side someone else?

Brene Brown said it well, sympathy is not empathy. They are vastly different emotions and they don’t require the same bandwidth or energy. Their process is uniquely different and so is their alignment.

For example, Monday morning you arrive at work and you greet your colleagues and say good morning and not much happens. It’s a rote response that feels automatic and doesn’t require active listening or any emotional bandwidth. That being said, if we don’t engage in active listening, then we miss opportunities to show up for others.

So we go through the day on automatic pilot, and literally no connection is weaved from our energy to another, What if we engaged a little more and started active listening as we said our good mornings on Monday? Would we hear something different? If we engaged differently and picked up inflections in people’s voices, this information might tell us something about this person, about their weekend, or about their morning. By active listening we engage ourselves to show up in a person’s life in a meaningful way.

We understand the first example when we just pass through the day and say good morning and step into our offices or cubicles. Nothing happens and no real connection transpires. If we engage into a deeper listening state, we might hear that a person didn’t really have a good weekend or perhaps their good morning is weak and disconnected. If we decided to pursue that and ask the individual if they are doing ok, we show up in a different way, a way in which we can ignite empathy.

So in the disconnected model, Bob walks in on Monday morning and he says good morning and goes to his office and no one picks up on the fact that Bob didn’t have a good weekend. In an active listening state, we could easily pick up that Bob didn’t have a good weekend, and we could ask him if he’s ok. He might not want to talk about it, but if we make the conversation comfortable enough for Bob, he might open up and tells us more. By active listening and being full present for Bob, we can create a ripple effect that could change Bob’s life and also ours.

So let’s say Bob is open to talking about it, and he comes to your office to share some news. He explains that his dog died over the weekend, and that his 6 year old daughter, while holding the dog in her arms, looked up at him with her little blue eyes and asked him if he was going to go away too? He explains that he didn’t know how to answer that question and his eyes start to water a bit.

So imagine if we didn’t pick up on Bob’s voice inflection when he arrived to work Monday morning and Bob just went about his day and did his work. We wouldn’t have created the opportunity to show up for Bob in an authentic way, a way in which he needed us to show up that Monday morning. If we had good advice to give Bob, perhaps we had been through something similar, then Bob could go home and have a better answer to give his daughter. Someday his daughter might have children of her own, and she might be in a similar situation. She might remember the advice that was given and she might give the same advice to her children.

The ripple effect we create is endless when we show up. We have no idea how far it will go, and who it will affect. If we can just try a little harder to show up for others, and integrate some deeper listening into our lives, perhaps we can show up for others when they really need us. Perhaps we can truly make a difference and break free from the rote and routine of our lives, and choose to connect and be present so that we can maximize our potential here on this volatile planet. Some people might think why bother, it’s not our business to meddle in other people’s lives, especially at work.

I have a brief but swift answer to all of that. If we don’t show up, then why are we here?

If you would enjoyed this blog, you might like Gregory Copploe’s book ” I Am Pink” available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.

By Gregory Copploe

Have you ever strolled through Costco only to find a cart smash up against your heels and inflict a severe amount of pain as you struggle to hold back your scream? Perhaps you have been walking through the park where another walker going the opposite direction just smashes into you. Why is it that some people are constantly aware of others and their environment, while some lose sight of the fact that there are other people besides themselves on Planet Earth?

For me, it is about mindfulness, plain and simple. In most scenarios I am sharing my environment with other human beings, and in some cases other animals, plant life, and even bodies of water. I am aware that others are around me, and I am looking around to ensure I am sharing the space evenly and thoughtfully.

Mindfulness is a way of life, exercising the brain to think differently to provide support and joy for yourself and others. It is a heightened awareness of everything around you, so that you can be used as a vessel of light for your highest good. Being present and showing up to be used in service is a key ingredient of mindfulness.

I remember being in Costco one day and this older gentleman was checking out. He had a naval cap on, and a naval shirt, so I assumed he was ex-military. He was probably in his eighties and was checking out when the cashier said his food stamps were declined. A few in line stared and gawked at the man while others weren’t aware that anything had transpired. The cashier tried the transaction again, and again said his food stamps were declined. I didn’t need to see any more. I dashed over and inserted my visa and ran back in line to secure my space in self-checkout. The cashier told the man his groceries had been paid and he looked dazed and confused. He didn’t see me at all. Some people came up to me and patted me on the back and wanted to shake my hand. I stopped and stared at all of them. I said this, “this isn’t an award showcase in which you come up and hug me. This is a message to all of you. If you see your fellow man in need, help him. Next time let it be you. Next time be mindful and awake enough to see the opportunity and take it. The window is a small one, be swift.”

So if this is mindfulness, then what is the other behavior? Is it simply a lack of education? Is it selfish behavior that manifests and perpetuates with ego? What makes some people mindful and others oblivious to the fact that they are here on Earth to assist and to love.

I think for most people, they haven’t sat down to think about what they are doing here, At least it feels that way. Many collect their toys along the way, and become attached to these things as if they truly believe they will inevitably take them to some other dimension when they crossover. Perhaps it is ego that ignites this selfish nature that the world revolves around only one person instead of a shared collective.

I get exhausted being bumped into, or having drivers do the unimaginable simply because they think they can regardless of how it impacts me or others around them. There is a ripple effect that we create each and every time we react and take action. This ripple effect can create positive change, or it can negate and tear down others. It can be a force for good, or a continued barrage of destruction. It is our choice how we use this force, this ripple, and we decide if it will be used for good or for other purposes.

Whenever we decide to let go of a ripple, a purposeful action, there is always a price to pay within the balance of all things. If the ripple or action is meant to lift up someone, then the price may be rewarded in some other area of your life as a returned ripple. Balance is circular. What you give out does indeed circle back.

I love the victim that complains about their world, their life, but takes no responsibility in regards to their actions and how they intentionally created it. Isn’t it time we all wake up and realize that we share the world with others and that means something? Isn’t it time that we try and make it as pleasant as possible for ourselves and others?

My biggest wish is that we all wake up from the deep sleep to realize that we are all connected, and no one escapes the karma of our actions. You either create joy, or you create hardship and pain. There is no ambiguity and no gray area in between. You are either awake and aware of how you can be used for service, or you are asleep and enraptured by the collection of your own selfish world.

As Maya Angelou said: “When you know better, do better”. I look forward to that day when we know more about our place in life, and care more about our fellow man so that we too “can do better”

Want to know more about mindfulness. Join Bruce Langford’s Mindfulness Mode Podcast and learn more about what it means to be mindful.

If you like this post, please check out Gregory Copploe’s book “I Am Pink” available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.

by Gregory Copploe

Does this picture look familiar? This is what I call the post pandemic short fuse. Instead of celebrating the fact that we can travel, gather, and celebrate life again, we remain incarcerated within a selfish mindset that “I” come first and the rest can just kiss my ass. How did we get here?

Despite our new found freedom, we remain disgruntled and angry that years of our lives have been stripped away. Many of us are in debt, or are paying back SBA loans that we all hoped would be forgiven. Layoffs are rampant, and our sense of stability and security is in limbo.

So instead of seeking out help, reducing our stress, or actively seeking some form of spirituality, we act out in ways that hurt each other. The picture above is a perfect example of the lack of mindfulness we have all seen and experienced post pandemic. Our neighbor acts out or the baby is crying next door, and we grab a gun and kill everyone inside. Some stranger comes to our door, and we decide to shoot our gun through the closed door and kill them. Is it fear or is it purposeful? Is it rage and anger that has taken over? We have literally lost our minds.

So how do we undo these feelings of anger and fear? How do we move forward during a strange time in which everyone’s fuse is short? Can we let go of the past, live in the present, and move forward? I would like to think that we all could do this, act maturely, and seek the help we need to live a healthier existence, but for many, they think this is the new normal.

I’ve seen grown men punch women in the deli section of my favorite organic food store. I have seen people hoarding products so that others cannot purchase them. Driving has become an obstacle course of fear as people run red lights, make left turns on one way streets going the wrong way, and then flip you off in return when you beep your horn to alert them that they could be harmed.

We have to make this better! Our lives and our happiness depend on it.

I am going to choose to lift one person up each day as I traverse through my daily routine, whether it be opening a door, holding the elevator, or giving someone a compliment. I am going to work on my awareness of others to ensure I am navigating in such a way, that my imprint is positive, and that their life might be better because I have made way for their imprint too. Making space for others, and letting them know that you see them is an important part of mindfulness. I am going to work on seeing others in a different way, and making space for them. Understanding and having empathy we are all carrying a heavy burden is part of the journey.

I will still see the behavior that disgusts me, but I can choose to focus on my own behavior and how I am counteracting the lack of mindfulness that oversaturates the landscape. It starts with each one of us, one person at a time to make a difference. I am tired of being sad, disappointed, and disgruntled by other’s behavior, and now I choose to take control of my thoughts and my mindset to create change. This is my saving grace. This is my mantra.

The only way we can elongate a short fuse is to feed it and give it love.

I see you.

If you like this post, please check out Gregory Copploe’s book ” I Am Pink” available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.